Ego-Free Compassion

Ego-Free Compassion = Performing acts of generosity, charity, and

kindness for strangers, anonymously, without receiving satisfaction,

recognition, or reward from any source other than from deep within;

giving simply for the intent of increasing the amount of goodness in the


Giving Anonymously – Where’s the Reward?

Dear Future or Current SSSSH Members:

The basis of SSSSH is giving to total strangers anonymously. This is a complex phenomena riddled with surprising manifestations. One engaging in this activity for the first time might experience an unsatisfied and somewhat empty feeling that follows his or her first few anonymous good deeds. Why?

One’s ego and self-esteem benefits through peer recognition of one’s accomplishments. Such reinforcement also improves one’s confidence and encourages personal growth, but how does this internal benefit occur when giving anonymously?

Giving to others with “ego-free compassion” may cause some internal-reward problems for someone just starting to do anonymous good deeds. Where’s your pat-on-the-back? Where are the complements from your peers acknowledging your unselfishness and generosity? Where’s that grateful tone in your recipient’s voice accompanied by the happy, sparkle-eyed excitement that makes you feel so good about what you’ve done? When giving anonymously, you might feel a little empty, unfulfilled, and even a little disappointed. Don’t be discouraged, for a wondrous essence is starting to emerge within you.

After completing your first anonymous good deed for a total stranger, I suggest you sit quietly alone for a few minutes. Listen to the silence. Something deep inside you has slightly stirred, as if an awakening spirit’s first tiny movement. You sense it, but it does not necessarily feel good or satisfying, it’s just an ever-so-slightly stirring deep within.

Now, when you are able, go do another anonymous good deed. Make sure you’re alone. Afterwards, sit quietly again. You’ll notice the stirring is stronger now, more discernible, and it seems to be accompanied by a curious peacefulness.

As you might suspect, a third anonymous good deed is suggested followed by another intimate session with your internal serenity. The deep stirring is again more noticeable and is actually the awakening of your “ego-free compassion.” By continuing to perform anonymous good deeds, you will cultivate an intimate bond with this awakening spirit. I suspect you will commit future anonymous acts simply to increase this bond, for doing so will become far more rewarding and satisfying than any of your formerly sought peer recognitions and compliments. Even more wonderful, you will have to keep this mystifying experience to yourself, for there are neither the words for you to adequately describe nor the comprehension for others to adequately grasp this phenomena. It must be experienced to be understood.

Anonymously creating more goodness in the world just for the sake of creating more goodness, that’s what SSSSH is all about – giving without your ego. It is a very complex, private, and internally-cherished undertaking. It takes practice, study, and reflection as do most extremely-gratifying accomplishments.

Remember, SSSSH is a “Secret Society.” It’s not only a secret because our members and their good deeds are anonymous, but also because the resulting intimacy with your ego-free compassion cannot be adequately described to anyone and remains within your internal serenity for only you to revere.

SSSSH is also a “Serendipitous Service,” and this will become most apparent as you continue performing anonymous good deeds (SSSSHing). Your selected recipients will benefit most remarkably from your anonymous kindnesses, as if they were carefully chosen through a detailed and tedious selection process instead of anonymously picked by you. Perhaps they actually were.

If you believe my implied existence of a wonderful ego-free spirit is nice, but a little irrational, it’s easy to verify - start SSSSHing. By doing so, you will authenticate for yourself these words, increase the amount of goodness in the word, discover the true meaning of ego-free compassion, and learn that serendipity now rests comfortably on your shoulder.

If you are now a member or will soon become a member of SSSSH, welcome to the magic, maintain your stealth, partake in many enchanted adventures, and have a delightfully-wondrous life! But remember, there will be few thank-you notes or recognitions, for SSSSH is truly a secret. The recognition is hiding deep within you; go exploring and find it there.

Most respectfully,

Roger F. Cram